I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I fill condoms, not promises.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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