call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
