its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
