So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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