Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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