her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Who died my cat blue again?
Randomize