Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
