k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
