you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
