But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
