I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize
