Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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