Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
