he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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