trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
