Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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