I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
420 ftw
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Randomize
