I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
