He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
