if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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