Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
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