Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
