But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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