gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize
