i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
bring money and cleavage
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Randomize
