and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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