If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
