craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
