how hairy? two words: wookie tits
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize