OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
