Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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