Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
