so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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