You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
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