So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
