Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Randomize