In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
