Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
