birth control should be required to get into college
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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