I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
The uberlube is also flammable
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Randomize
