Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
