quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
