I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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