he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
