Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
