ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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