My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
he was CRYING into my vagina
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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