Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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