Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
