Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
